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By Alex Lauzon from the “Course of Life” podcast
The betting lines are out on who will don the honor of being Giselle and Tom’s rebound fling. Because of course they are. Let’s break ’em down.
Now that the biggest power couple across sports and modeling have officially lawyered up and decided to end things (for now), the natural reaction for the true degenerates out there is simple: what kind of action can I get on their dating pool?
Quite arguably one of the most eligible bachelors and bachelorettes are simultaneously going to be back out on the market, so it should be nothing short of a feeding frenzy, so to speak. From the concrete jungles of New York to the hills of Hollywood and the yachts of Ibiza, potential mates from the most elite circles of the world are about to have their chance at love with Giselle or Tom.
Without further ado, let’s break down the tape on these two forces of nature, and see who could be their lucky suitor in the near future. Ladies first:
The Brazilian supermodel is consistently ranked as one of (if not THE) highest paid model in the world. Part entrepreneur, part global ambassador, all success. The 42-year-young Bundchen came off of a 5-year relationship with Leonardo DiCaprio from 2000-2005 (people forget), and has been with Brady since 2006 when they first met. She re-enters the singles scene in peak condition, no injury report issues here – except for her husband’s concussion concerns.
So who does Vegas like as her next suitor? Let’s examine the books:
Pete Davidson (+1200) – Shocker, the former SNL comedian who slings it in every direction of the celebrity map appears on the betting board. He does have an unbelievable resume of past lovers so it wouldn’t shock me to see him arm and arm with Giselle one day.
Jason Mamoa (+1800) – Though linked off and on to actress Eiza Gonzalez, it’s not official enough to keep him off the board. Aquaman could swim his way into Gisele’s arms if he gets the opportunity.
Leonardo DiCaprio (+2000) – People forget that before Gisele married Brady, her and DiCaprio were in a FIVE YEAR relationship together from 2000-2005. Could Leo swing back around for a second chance and pull a Ben Affleck? Oddsmakers think it’s possible, but Leo’s taste in younger women certainly makes it a longshot.
Longshots Worth A Thought
Bradley Cooper (+2500) – The Perfectly Cool actor has been tied to politician Huma Abedin recently, but he matches the fit of “I could see them together” pretty nicely if they ever connect.
Neymar (+3000) – An Intriguing idea because of his position in the global sports picture. There’s not many name brands in the world of sports as big as Tom Brady, but Neymar is one of them. Plus he’s a fellow Brazilian and matches the star power to fill Tom’s shoes…with cleats.
Aaron Rodgers (+6600) – They would be so insufferable i’m actually here for it – this is quite the revenge play by Rodgers after all those losses on the football field to Brady.
Antonio Brown (+10000) – The internet would explode and so would the balance in your account.
Alex’s Plays: Leonardo DiCaprio +2000, Neymar +3000
The SEVEN-time Super Bowl Champion (still blows my mind) is the undisputed GOAT of the NFL. His off-the-field endorsements and TB12 empire have not only complemented his absurd duration on the football field, but they’ve padded his wallets nicely too. The 45-years-old (but still so young at times) Brady has a somewhat mysterious dating history pre-Gisele, which included his first child from a relationship with actress Bridget Moynahan and a rumored Tara Reid fling.
Brady enters the singles pool with a big-time dad joke vibe, but being the greatest QB of all-time with Hollywood bits should allow a few to overlook that.
Let’s take a gander at Brady’s lead pack for his next significant other:
Taylor Swift (+1400) – Well, it is the Fall, this is Taylor Swift season… might as well throw dating drama into the mix! A true power couple indeed, and though Swift is tied to Joe Alwin at the moment, her quick hopping through relationships in the past still has her installed as the betting favorite.
Adriana Lima (+1600) – This is a very on-brand favorite and hard to resist. A fellow Brazilian supermodel, so it makes all the sense in the world to be “Brady’s type.” However, she just had a child with her current boyfriend so a lot would have to happen soon for this to work.
Kim Kardashian (+2500) – Arguably two of the most recognizable names on the internet getting together would certainly be something. She is single so it’s not farfetched, but they tend to run in very different Hollywood circles so it will take a Kris Jenner intervention.
Jennifer Aniston (+2500) – As a kid fellow growing up in the 90’s watching Friends, I can bet you that Tom Brady had a crush just like I did on Rachel Green. She is 8 years Tom’s senior at 53 but definitely still a catch.
Longshots Worth A Thought
Halle Berry (+3000) – Much like Aniston, she is right in that age range of Hollywood fame that would fit for Brady’s generation, but her being in a committed relationship for the last two years does not work.
Tara Reid (+4000) – The forgotten actress who was everyone’s American Pie crush for six months once had a BRIEF fling with a young Tom Brady in 2001 – what a win it would be for her to get him back
Jada Pinkett-Smith (+1000) – If this actually happens and she drops the “Smith” for “Brady,” Will might be looking at another on-stage confrontation very soon.
Alex’s Plays: Kim Kardashian +2500, Jennifer Aniston +2500